I didn’t see this coming and I think it’s funny, so I decided to post it here.
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Announcing FemtoServices™ - One Packet at a Time!
In an era of bloated bandwidth and endless data streams, today we proudly unveil a groundbreaking approach to networking: FemtoServices™ – Connectivity, one Ethernet packet at a time!
(Not to be confused with our premium product, ParticleServices, which just shoot neutrinos around one by one.)
Poe’s law strikes again!
I can’t agree more!
We already have nanoservices, they’re called functions. If you want a function run on another box, that’s called RPC.
Soooooo… Linux with extra steps.
brb deploying each bin from coreutils as a separate aws lambda function
Found the OpenAI employee 🤣
I work in government IT, and AWS is used there too. I prefer working with a team delivering a COBOL data cruncher service, though the build people have it easier when the job is just connecting a source to a sink in AWS
What’s next? Femtofunctions
You only need two of them, one for
1and one for0
Cant wait to set up a docker container for a service which takes a string input and transforms it into a number as the output. Full logging, its own certificate for encryption of course, 5 page config options and of course documentation. Now, you want to add two numbers together? You got the addition service set up right?
left-pad as a service.
It’s a modern day enterprise fizzbuzz: https://github.com/EnterpriseQualityCoding/FizzBuzzEnterpriseEdition
Oh yeah, this is the stuff business dreams are made of.
I feel like this name addresses the problem of services claiming to be microservices when they’re not.
Does that even happen? cat is micro, sed is micro, systemd isn’t and doesn’t claim to be
Metaservices.
Planck services
My services are so small that it is impossible to know just how fast they are running!
I am now offering Planck services for sale, at US$0.0001 per bit.
For an extra fee, you can even choose the value of the bit.
I was going to write that every function should be a service as sarcasm, then I realized that’s exactly what this article is proposing. Now I’m not even sure how to make a more ridiculous proposal than this.
It’s probably AI-supported slop.
Ah, you’re right
Yeah, I had been willing to give the author the benefit of the doubt that this was all part of a big joke, until I saw that the rest of their blog postings are also just like this one.
Why would your whole function be 1 service? That is bad for scalability! Your code is bad and the function will fail 50% of the time half way through anyway. By splitting up the your function in different services, you can scale the first half without having to scale the second half.
IaaS Instructions as a Service
Want to know if a value is odd? Boy have we got the API for you!
Boy have we got the API for you!
Neovimservices ftw
no services, fuck you
quantum services
take your source code and put each character in its own docker container
this gives you the absolute peak of scalability and agility as every quantum of your application is decoupled from the others and can be deployed or scaled independently
implementing, operating and debugging this architecture is left as an exercise for the reader
that will be $250,000 kthx
implementing, operating and debugging this architecture is left as an exercise for the reader
Challenge accepted by a reader using AI, what could go wrong? xD
This “article” was written by AI, wasn’t it? This is just throwing vague buzzwords around
deleted by creator
I dunno people were doing that long before AI
That intro and general structure (AI loves bulleted lists but then again so do I) sure sound like a lot of the responses I’ve gotten. As always, it’s hard to say for sure.
This is just the Linux way but with… Rest? Seems slow.
