just tell them there is a black man at the moment of theft, they will get on it lickety split!
- Binary search: O(log(n))
- Sequential search: O(n)
- Linear search: O(n)
- Police ethnicity database search: O(0)
No need to search when you already have someone you wanna pin it on.
Sad meme very relevant
“Exactly my point. We will not be investing an hour looking at the footage to pinpoint the time of theft, now get out!”
Show up with a box of donuts.
“Hey, look what I got for us to eat while looking at that tape!”
“Oh, I don’t think those donuts will last more than ten minutes here!”
“No problem, I know a way that won’t take that long…”
I’m sure it didn’t go well. If it was somehow framed in a sycophantic way where the police were led to believe it was their idea, I’m sure it would have gone better. Wait that might not be too difficult to do.
You just have to say there was a weird technique the Nazi’s liked to use.
They probably already know all Nazi techniques.
Na. If it’s British police it’s just an excuse. All they’re there for after all these years of Tory cuts is to give you a reference number so you can make an insurance claim.
I was in exactly this situation. My bike was stolen, there was CCTV, they said it would take hours to go through the time during which it was stolen.
“Can I have a copy of the recording?”
That’s what I said, and they said no
In Artillery you call it bracketing/straddling.
It’s called bracketing in electrical engineering as well for troubleshooting.
Called half splitting in troubleshooting terms when I was in the Navy.
Half split bracketing was the term I learned in aviation electronic school in the Navy.
“Hmm still no magic smoke, double the current will you Jeeves?”
Fried electronics have such a unique "“oh fuck” smell
The smell of the magic smoke that gets released from the electronics, preventing them from working.
That’s an analogy that might appeal to the LE types.
Binary boom
Source article for the curious, and an unpaywalled copy on archive.is
A police officer being unable to think in such a fashion is exactly why no one could solve the see-saw riddle on Brooklyn 99.
How do you solve that? I saw a solution in the comments where it says to start with numbering all the people and butting 1234 and 5678 on the see saw, then it says if they weight the same then continue and that seems to work. But if they dont weigh the same it doesnt work and it doesnt say what to do in that case.
If 1234 and 5678 don’t weigh the same youd need 4 seesaws in some cases
you can do it like you weight 6v6 then 3v3 then for the last weighing you weight the 2 out of 3.
or you weigh 4v4 to find out which grouping of 4 the light weight person is in, then do 2v2 and 1v1.
You don’t know if the person is lighter or heavier yet.
That’s not the question. Either the scales balance, and the third is heavier or lighter, or the scales don’t balance and you get both answers, but the question is purposely framed this way
I mean that not knowing it is part of the question, and the proposed solution doesn’t work without knowing if the person is heavier or lighter.
If you know if the person is heavier or lighter, the question becomes trivial.
The question is to figure out who is different, not how they are different. That takes one more step, half the time.
Yes, I’m aware. But with 12 people you can’t simply divvy the groups in threes constantly, because if you weigh and the groups are unequal, then you don’t know in which group the different person is (yet). E.g., weighing ABCD - EFGH can tell you the different person is in IJKL if the groups are even, but if they’re uneven you don’t know in which of the other two groups the different person is.
The question was to find who doesnt weigh the same and if its heavier or lighter. Watch the clip again.
For those looking for the handout:
person: A B C D E F G H I J K L
round 1: L L L L R R R R — — — -
round 2: L L R R R — — — L R L -
round 3: L R R — — L R — L L — R
This would be easier to parse with a monospaced font. I’m not sure how that works in lemmy so this might take an edit or two…
round 1: L L L L R R R R — — — - round 2: L L R R R — — — L R L - round 3: L R R — — L R — L L — R```Cool, thanks. I’m not the best at formatting when using my phone.
Oh i get it. So if in round 1 it tilted down on the right. Round 2 it was even then round 3 it tilted down on the right then it was person G and they are heavier. However if it was reversed and tilted on the left then even then left then it was still person G but they are lighter. Because that pattern only occurs once. This is brilliant. Thankyou to you and the person you corrected the formatting of.
Where is the piped bot when you need it
You can just replace the domain of the url with
piped.video:deleted by creator
For anybody else looking for the source of this quote: https://archive.md/RyZI0
acab
all cops aren’t binary-searching
Pfft, didn’t even try to enhance the footage. They’re obviously not cut out for forensics work.
Police try to understand anything challenge (100% impossible) (gone sexual) (gone violent)
I once had a friend who was robbed of all kinds of stuff including a PS3, and that the guy was signed into his Netflix changing account profiles the very same day. I told him he can just get a tracking number by calling Playstation and that the active police officer can use it to track them. Thing is, the officer ghosted him for like 8 months despite having everything they needed to immediately find the exact location of the perpetrator actively using the stolen property.
We just give all the tools to solve crimes to people who have no idea how to use them, no biggie.
*have a perverse incentive to not know how to use them or to know things about their job generally.
Sat on jury duty. We literally said not guilty because the officer was supposed to follow a process for line ups and they didn’t even do the bare minimum. They were like we got out guy
This argument did not go well
You can’t convince people to do their job with logic when they just don’t want to do their job. After minorities, the thing cops hate most is doing their job.
WRONG! After minorities, it’s poor people. Then doing their job. :P
Come on, don’t disparage our hard-working Boys in blue. Without police who’s going to come to your house to take notes about the crime that you have sufficient evidence to prove, and even have a likely suspect for, and then never follow up?
when they just don’t want to do their job.
It might also be a matter of getting a directive from their management not the care, because there’s not enough cops to go around for the ‘important’ stuff.
They don’t want to waste their limited time for simple property theft, which is ironic considering that’s what police are supposed to be doing (stopping theft).
The answer would be then to hire more police, but unfortunately that would mean higher taxes for the citizenry, and that seems to be a hard glass ceiling.
More police wouldn’t cost more money if they stopped buying tanks.
Wrong
The police exists to protect the status quo. Try overthrowing any immoral law or legally but immoral behavior and you’ll see how efficiently they move about.
Before handing out life advice maybe try it IRL and see how it goes. It’s kinda fun.
I tried being born rich but it didn’t work this time around. Maybe next re incarnation?
No, the police just don’t want to do any work. In my hometown you can’t get the police to do shit unless you are a black man who “fits the description” or “smells like weee” then they will gladly try to make your death look as much your fault as possible.
removed by mod
I assume he doesn’t have access to it. He just knows there’s a camera pointing at the place where his bike was stolen, and that the police have access to the footage.
They might not know when in the footage it happened
I’m a little surprised the police didn’t already know about that method. Seems like they’d encounter enough CCTV footage that’d it’d be standard training.
I once again overestimate the training levels of the police.
They probably do know. They just aren’t meant for protecting your personal property
Right.
What they really want to say is “We aren’t interested in investigating your personal theft. Things get stolen all the time and we really can’t be bothered. You are not important to us.”
But they can’t say that, so they instead throw out some excuse that puts the onus back on the other person.
You dont quite understand.
They aren’t here to protect your property.
Or you, really.
Not unless you have a couple million in assets, then all of a sudden it’s all hands on deck, let’s get this bicycle back.
deleted by creator
They can, and do, say that.
Edit: just without the you’re not important to us part.
And Detective Conan Doyle O’Brien really did just let his bro fuck around and watch porn and even bring a stripper into the station during footage reviewing hours. Of course, Stuart was quite shocked to hear he was not invited to the stag do later that weekend
I dunno. “Don’t attribute to malice that which can be sufficiently explained by stupidity.” I can totally believe that the average police officer has not thought this through. “5 hours of footage! We don’t have 5 hours to look for one bike.”
“Don’t attribute to malice that which can be sufficiently explained by stupidity.”
It’s a somewhat narrow situation. You won’t always have the object of interest in plain view of a camera. What if it’s behind a door? Well now you do have to scrub through all the footage
For sure they know, it’s just cops are lazy and aren’t paid to solve crimes
I imagine it’s utilized in more “serious” investigations and they just can’t be arsed for theft.
In the US most their training involves how to be more aggressive veiled as training to be assertive.
They’re paid by the hour.
“Yes, chief, I’ll need 72h to manually review all 72h of footage and cannot do any other activities in the meantime.”
Yeah, pigs don’t like to be corrected. Or made to look like they don’t know what they’re doing.
And they absolutely hate ever doing anything about bicycle theft in particular.
And they absolutely hate ever doing anything
about bicycle theft in particular.FTFY
I have heard that very often. I wonder if bikes are harder to track down than other property for some reason.
I’m pretty sure any petty theft is very hard to track down. Not just bikes, if someone broke into your house and stole some minor things it’s almost certainly not gonna get found. Bikes are the same, it’s very easy to resell them and repaint, and nobory registers bikes.
Given the number of times I’ve seen cops on police forums and r/protectandserve use terms like “bikefags”, I think it’s just the typical cop disgust of anything they perceive to be weak or effeminate.
As a gay cyclist I know I’m doing something right by pissing off cops without doing anything wrong
Thank you for you service o7
Yeah, I don’t get that. Bicycling requires strength and endurance. It exposes you to the elements. Why is sitting in a cushy car something some people think as being more macho? Is it that you’re in control of a heavier and more powerful machine?
Bicycling requires strength and endurance.
So does cleaning a house, but that’s “women’s work”.
Is it that you’re in control of a heavier and more powerful machine?
That’s it. You didn’t get it at first because made the mistake of associating manliness with things like patience, strength, hard work, endurance both of toil and hardship; all things that do make up ideals of manliness to normal people. But you need to approach it from the perspective of a wastrel, a weak, foolish, and lazy person who demands the respect and deference of being manly without putting in the hard work—something he has avoided all his life. He might praise hard work in abstract, but he has no discipline for it and doesn’t respect those who actually do it, he just considers them beneath him. To such a person, the defining aspect of manliness and machismo is mastery, mastery over others and their wills, and since mastery through work is a waste of time to him, he turns to shortcuts.
From there, it’s not hard to see where the thought process goes. Since strength is to him based on control and mastery, he picks something that gives him more command over the road in a direct and in-your-face way. The man who drives a lifted Ram 2500 can confront you by running you the fuck over. By contrast, in his opinion, cyclists are entitled jackasses in miniscule booty shorts who can only confront you on the road by screaming “CRITICAL MASS! FUCKING CAGER!” and throwing sparkplugs at your windows. The difference in power dynamic is proof enough to our friend of who the “real man” is.
To take the mentality to its conclusion, the easiest way to gain mastery in general is through authority, and the easiest way to get that, even easier than joining a gang, is by becoming a cop.
In Poland we have a saying about bike theft, that they won’t even consider looking for it unless you are the commendant’s son.
Because even if they look for it and find it, whoever is riding just says it theirs and there is literally nothing the police can do unless it was caught on video or there is a meaningful identifying feature like a serial number or something else specific and unique.
Seeing a sketchy guy with a black and red bike with the same bike rack you had isn’t enough to prove anything.
If an officer approached me riding my bike around and asked me to prove it’s mine, I couldn’t either despite not being a thief.
Anything that’s not serialized and recorded is basically impossible to find. If you have serial numbers then they can inform local pawn shops, but even then the shops probably aren’t checking serials for anything under $500.
And if the thief just sells it on craigslist then no one is checking serials.
They only care about property loss when it involves rich people.
Which proves that cops really DO actually do their jobs.
Because protecting the property of the rich is the exact core purpose of policing.
Technically it’s maintaining social order. So get back to work menials or be reported to the Enforcers for organized discontent.
Maintaining social order, especially in the form of violent repression against demonstrations, indirectly protects the rich’s properties, so all in a day’s work.
smaller, therefore easier to hide. Not registered with a central authority like, for example, cars.
There is bike registration. https://bikeindex.org
It’s helped track down bike trafficking gangs sending bikes to Mexico. The police just don’t care at all
Love bikeindex, I actually got my stolen bike back thanks to that site. It was literally two years later but still, the police wouldn’t have even made a report probably in the city I was at, with bike theft so ubiquitous.
There’s plenty of cases where they don’t look for cars either.
Or the cops themselves just straight up steal the car themselves.
My wife’s car was ordered to be towed by, according to the impound lot, the police.
Neat thing was that there was no ticket with the car, no police station within 3 miles had a record of a ticket for her or the car, and the area she had parked had no signs that suggested it was illegal to park where she did, nor does the city have any ordinance about overnight parking.
Best we can figure, is a cop or the tow company that works with the city, just decided to tow a car for funsies and the 500 bucks it took to get it out of impound.
The police and every organization associated with them are corrupt to the core.
Reading that I almost had a thought like it must have been a mix-up or something, but no, US police will murder people with less thought, so that type of fuckery is completely expected.
It probably depends a lot on where you live. My wife’s bike got stolen and she was woken up by police coming to check on it (one of the maintenance guys at our apartment noticed a man at 7-Eleven riding it and recognized it; came back running to check if it’s indeed missing and called the police). We fully expected the police would do nothing about it (it was the cheapest Walmart bike), but an hour later they called that they found the bike and have the culprit in custody. It did help that the bike was a girly mint green with a wicker basket, so they instantly recognized it when they saw it.
Then again, in San Francisco, when my wife got her car window smashed and wallet stolen (she was late for class and dropped her wallet under the car seat, didn’t stop to take it; but it wasn’t the wallet that caught the thieves’ attention, it was the breast pump bag that looked like a laptop bag; they threw it on the floor when they saw what it was), we never heard anything back from the police.
I reported my bike stolen in college and I got a call the next day that they had found it parked in front of a nearby church.
It was stolen on a Sunday. I guess someone didn’t want to be late to service.
What you’re entering the third act of your love story and you have to get to the church in time to break up the wedding and declare your love, what’s a little bike theft? The universe will take care of it.
God made them do it!
Probably added the theft to the sins they were confessing that day as well.
Fun fact. Cops on average have lower IQ and often fail literacy tests. Furthermore it appears that critical thinking is discouraged in the job, with candidates being selected who lack critical thinking abilities over those that have them.
It sounds like this could be applied to the military too
The military doesn’t actively exclude smarter people. However they 100% prey on people who are less educated
We need to have a chat about your definition of “fun”.
Certain departments specifically have IQ tests, in order to ensure you aren’t smart enough to easily get a better job elsewhere.
This internet myth has got to die. ONE case in ONE department, a quarter century ago, does not mean it’s a practice.
Anyone got a non-paywalled link?
deleted by creator
Can you blame them if they can not find one from after 1999?
Because the 1999 story is the origin of this talk.
I think it’s more nefarious than that. Many departments want a good 'ol boys club where they’re the ultimate authority and they want their officers to fall in line rather than question department actions.
