Probably not a good title to seek upvotes. If it does get upvotes, more programmers get share in your pain 😅
Write spaghetti code and don’t listen to advice telling you to improve
I mean, the headline of this post already makes me irrationally angry. 😂
Y u no close brackets!?
I think that’s the joke, Clyde!
You guys are too slow, we need to hire more of you and let the sales teams use AI to add features the client asks without waiting for you.
AI can code now, in 2 mins I can create an app, so it shouldn’t take you long to make changes to this 10year old product.
Make them do project management.
Make them stand up.
You have no power here! I use a standing desk.
short variable names, and the only vowel is ‘i’
I inherited an old Japanese codebase. Tons of stuff was just single-letter variables. Apparently, this used to be at least somewhat common here. I spent a lot of time just updating code to replace vars with something meaningful (and found bonus bugs due to improper scoping with same var names as a bonus). Didn’t have an IDE that would easily do it for me at the time and running something like
sedfelt too risky.skibidi = 42from multiprocessing import Lock l = Lock()flake8 … way too ambiguous
Insist they index from 1. Like God and Fortran intended it. ;)
Fuck C and it’s lazy shit pointer arithmetic array indexing shortcut. I.e. you just add the index × size(t) to the array pointer.
Bounds checking? We’ve heard of it.
It’s fast though.
Like riding a motorcycle in a tee shirt and shorts.
I’ve ridden a motorbike in a T-shirt and kilt before. That’s … fun …
And sun glasses, don’t forget the aviators.
While Mr “I can’t code without a garbage collector” is still putting on his backplate of “oh no pointers are bad” and a duck typed full face helmet, to ride his interpreted moped, the big boys, Mr C-ool and Mr ASSembly, are already downing grain alcohol at the finish line.
But then again I really don’t like to step out of my embedded RTOS bubble. It really depends on what you want to accomplish and how complicated your system is.
embedded RTOS
That sounds like a domain where memory safety is secondary to size and speed… though compile time memory safety guarantees could help.
Good thing we have so many options!
This is the hardest I’ve seen a someone try to not mention Rust. I’m actually impressed.
Have you seen rust? I couldn’t code like that, what a silly language https://lemmy.world/post/26105353
so what if it’s 100x slower /nosarc
And MATLAB!
MATLAB is basically a UI wrapper around Fortran’s BLAS and LAPACK – change my mind. ;)
And Lua!
And Julia!
Correctly highlight when a programmer is being assumptive as a brick, even when assumptions are one of the biggest sins in programming. Done, you’ve triggered a lot of programmers.
Compile your kernel with a different version of ld then shipped with your distro. I have this right now in Debian testing and it’s enraging. I’m not even sure if that’s the source of my error
This but make it so only the browser can’t tell time.
Micromanagement to speed up product release date. Daily meeting and status reports, work breakout categories such as ‘code design’, ‘code development’, ‘code documentation’, etc,etc (flash back gif of Apache helicopters flying over a jungle
Html is a programming language.
That’s right there with calling JS, PowerShell and Bash “programming languages”. I said what I said.
Edit: I’m a developer myself and it looks like I triggered everyone just as the post said. Thanks for playing!
I think what people generally mean when they say programming language (other than just a language to write a program) is that the language is turing complete. Even with this more limited definition, JavaScript, Bash, and Powershell are turing complete and therefore programming languages.
Tell me you don’t know what a programming language is without telling me you don’t know what a programming language is
tbf javascript is not a programming language, it is the language of the devil
What if the devil is a programmer?
Would explain a lot of things actually
Relevant XKCD : https://xkcd.com/859/
#define if while #define true false
Or a classic:
#define true (rand() % 2) #define false (rand() % 2)That’s evil
You’d like the IOCCC.
Great times. And new rules every year!
I have this great idea for an app, we can go 70/30 on it! 70 for me because the idea is the hardest part after all. So basically it’s Twitter plus Facebook plus Tinder with a built in MMO. You can get that done in a couple weeks, should be pretty easy right?
Tinder MMO huh? You may be onto something…
But, if you want my opinion, I want 15%
