Wherever you land, there’s some great online communities where you may find support.

A few points to hang on to:

• Your awareness of injustice is commendable.
• You don’t have to change everything about your life all at once.
• You’re allowed to say “I don’t know.”
• You have a right to change your mind.
• You can still talk to God. If they’re not up there listening (and they’re probably not) - well, no harm done.
• You don’t have to give up most of the great things your faith brought you. Charity, service, kindness, and community still feel fantastic, as an agnostic.
• Take your time to process what you’re learning, and be kind and forgiving to your past self. You were raised the way you were raised. It’s still part of your story, and that has value.
• Some of what you learned in your religion may not make any sense anymore. Be patient with yourself while you learn about alternatives.
• A lot of stuff that used to make sense to you still probably does. That’s okay, too.

Edit: And some useful definitions:

• Atheist - Non-religious.
• Non-practicing Christian - may still believe the same things, or still partake of the same traditions, but have decided to no longer take part in the harmful structures of the church.
• Agnostic - Unsure, or confidently sure that it doesn’t matter to you, personally. Or a staunch defender of everyone’s (maybe God-given) right to be unsure.

There’s a lot of non-practicing Christian’s out there today, thanks to shitty state of the modern church. (Which is rooted in the shitty state of the ancient church.) You don’t have to stop using the term Christian just because some assholes co-opted it (several centuries ago…)

But you might want to stop using the term, that’s okay, too.

Myself, I figure God can clean up their church if they want me to ever claim membership again. So far they don’t seem to be treating it like a priority, if they even exist…