Java is in a completely different leagues to the rest of these.
Whatever you think Java sucks at, the other languages mentioned here suffer from much worse.
Does Java have an elegant way of compiling to native machine code now? Genuinely asking.
Not java itself, but GraalVM can do this https://www.graalvm.org/latest/reference-manual/native-image/
I can’t confidently tell you it’s production ready as I have never used it myself.
That’s why the Java programmer looks happier in the “after” pic. Not as much as Python but it’s still there.
The jpeg is strong, but if you look closely she is covered with scabs and sores.
Checks out
A language is only as enjoyable as the hellish legacy projects that you’ll actually spend your time maintaining.
I’d rather use a language that doesn’t treat me like an incompetent child, removing unsigned ints because “they’re a source of bugs”.